.Publisher's Details: The adhering to is actually the message of a letter from Expedition Three Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Leader, USN Retired), reassessing the celebrations of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I have not composed very much about specifics of this particular objective during the month I have actually been right here, primarily for two factors: the initial being that there has actually been really little bit of opportunity to perform that type of writing, as well as furthermore, considering that I'm uncertain how comfortable I am actually discussing thought and feelings I share with friends and family along with the remainder of the planet.Well, definitely the planet modified today. What I mention or carry out is really small reviewed to the significance of what happened to our nation today when it was struck by ... by whom? Terrorists is all we know, I presume. Challenging to understand at whom to guide our temper and fear ...I had just completed a number of activities this morning, the best lengthy being actually the physical exams of all staff participants. In a private discussion following that, the trip cosmetic surgeon informed me they were actually possessing a really poor day on the ground. I possessed no suggestion ...He explained the scenario to me as greatest he recognized it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was thrown for a loop, after that alarmed. My initial thought and feelings was that this had not been a genuine conversation, that I was actually still listening closely to one of my Tom Clancy strips. It only didn't seem to be achievable on this scale in our country. I couldn't also picture the particulars, even prior to the information of further damage began coming in.Vladimir came by fairly rapidly, sensing that one thing incredibly significant was being actually reviewed. I waved Michael in to the module too. They were actually additionally surprised as well as stunned. After we signed off, I tried to reveal to Vladimir and Michael as ideal I could possibly the possible magnitude of the show of terror in midtown Manhattan and also at the Government. They clearly recognized as well as were very compassionate.I browsed the World Map on the computer to observe where over the planet our experts were as well as noticed that our experts were actually coming southeast away from Canada as well as would be overlooking New England in a handful of mins. I zoomed around the terminal until I found a home window that will offer me a view of NYC and also grabbed the nearby camera. It took place to be a camera, and I was actually appearing southern coming from the home window of Michael's cabin.The smoke cigarettes seemed to possess a weird blossom to it at the bottom of the pillar that was actually streaming south of the area. After checking out among the news articles our company merely acquired, I believe our experts were actually taking a look at NY around the moment of, or not long after, the failure of the second high rise. How dreadful ...I swung the video camera during the East Shore to the south to see if I might see every other smoke cigarettes around Washington, or even anywhere else, yet absolutely nothing showed up.It was actually rather difficult to think about work after that, though our team had some to do, however on the following track our team crossed the United States additional south. All three people were working 1 or 2 video cameras to attempt to obtain viewpoints of Nyc or Washington. There was actually fog over Washington, yet no certain source could be observed. Everything appeared incredible coming from two to three hundred kilometers away. I can't picture the awful scenes on the ground.Aside from the psychological influence of our country being actually attacked as well as lots of our consumers as well as perhaps some friends being gotten rid of, the most difficult emotion being where I am actually is one of seclusion.Following day ... I presume the exhaustion as well as mental stress received the most effective of me. I could not stay awake as well as continue to compose. Today was still tough, yet our experts started getting even more relevant information, plus our team possessed the honor of talking directly with the Center Supervisor, Roy Estess, that assured our company that the ground teams will continue to work and guarantee our safety, and also the secure function of the Place. We also spoke with our Administrator, Mr. Goldin, that incorporated that the companions in the Program are all entirely devoted to proceeding risk-free procedures as well as support. These were never questions for me. I recognize all these people! The ground crews have been actually extremely encouraging, very understanding of the impact of the information, and also have attempted to become as valuable as feasible. They have actually all been incredibly qualified and centered though I can not picture the diversion of this type of headlines being available in as well as the idea that federal government structures might be at risk. They never bypassed a beat, also when moving nerve center. And also a team of senior workers as well as pals offered our team a fairly complete rundown about what was recognized and also what was actually being done in the federal government and at NASA on Tuesday mid-day, which was actually extremely valuable and also kind of them to do in the midst of all the distress. The Russian TsUP has likewise been actually supportive and also valuable, trying to uplink newspaper article when our personal resources were inoperable, as well as mentioning kind phrases ...My crewmates have actually been actually terrific, too. They know it's been a challenging time for me as well as the individuals on the ground, and they have actually attempted to be as even keeled and beneficial as feasible. Michael even corrected me my favored Borscht soup for supper. As well as they give me lots of room to believe when I needed it. They are actually incredibly sympathetic and obviously shocked at whoever will do this.I recognize so many people in Washington, many individuals that travel to DC and also NYC, a lot of who are aviators, that I really felt sure I will get a minimum of a handful of parts of trouble over the following couple of days. I received the very first one today when I found out that the Captain of the American Airlines jet that attacked the Government was Chic Burlingame, a friend of mine. I encountered Chic during cadet summer when our team were in the D&B with each other, as well as our team possessed tons of lessons with each other. I can't imagine what he should of gone through, and also currently I listen to that he might have risen even more than our company can easily also consider through potentially preventing his plane coming from being the one to tackle the White House. What a horrible loss, yet I'm sure Chic was actually dealing with bravely to the end. As well as tears don't circulate the exact same precede ...It is actually tough to illustrate how it experiences to become the only United States fully off the earth each time such as this. The sensation that I need to exist with all of you, taking care of this, helping in some way, is actually difficult. I understand that our company are on the limit (or even beyond) of an awful change in the record of the world. Lots of things will definitely never be the same again after September 11, 2001. Not just for the manies thousand and countless individuals straight influenced through these ghastly acts of violence, but most likely for everybody. Our team will certainly locate ourselves really feeling in a different way about loads of points, consisting of probably room exploration, sadly.It's unpleasant to see smoke cigarettes putting coming from cuts in your own country from such an excellent point of view. The dichotomy of getting on a space probe devoted to improving life on the planet and seeing life being actually damaged through such intentional, horrendous acts is jolting to the mind, despite who you are. And also the understanding that every little thing will definitely be actually various than when our team introduced by the opportunity our team land is actually a little disconcerting. I have confidence in our country and also in our management that our company will definitely carry out every thing feasible to much better defend her and our family members, as well as to deliver fair treatment wherefore has actually been actually performed. I have assurance that the excellent folks at NASA will definitely carry out everything necessary to continue our objective safely and also return our company securely at the correct time. As well as I overlook all of you very much. I can not exist along with you in person, as well as our team have a long way to go to finish our goal, but be certain that my heart is actually along with you, as well as recognize you remain in my requests.Humbly, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An upgrade to the last character ... Fortunately, it is actually been a busy week up listed below. And to prove that, like our country, our experts are continuing on our designated pathway with business as usual (as long as possible). Tonight the current addition to the place, the Russian Docking Compartment will certainly be introduced coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday night (US time), it will certainly dock along with our team, at a port never made use of just before on the low point side of the Service Component. This brand-new component will definitely give our team one more place to dock a Progress or Soyuz as well as are going to offer a big airlock along with 2 able to be used hatches for performing EVA's in Russian Orlan matches, which our company are going to perform a few of just before our company get back.The issue prior to in handling recently was actually insufficient information. The complication now is a lot of. It arrived at one time when e-mail was actually restored, as well as there's inadequate time to read all of it! Plus it is actually too difficult to deal with all of it immediately. But I appreciate receiving it, and also I actually appreciate the terrific characters of assistance and also friendship I am actually getting.Our company are actually prospering aboard, receiving our work carried out, as well as discussing factors. Last night our company had a long dialogue over supper concerning the significance of these activities, the possible actions to follow, and also what should be done. After supper, Michael challenged telling me that every email he got coming from friends in Russia stated specifically to inform me just how sorry they were actually that this taken place, extending their condolences, as well as inquiring exactly how I was actually performing. Vladimir taught me the Russian phrase for "acknowledgements" after talking with the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Celebrity Metropolitan area. (Both the Russian and also the English phrases are considerably extremely long to verbalize easily.) Quite kind people.For the last two days, the Russian MCC has actually sufficed to broadcast online programs of radio information concerning the activity as well as associated tales, to ensure I was well updated. Every specialist who has begun free throw line to review a treatment or even a problem has at some factor expanded greetings to me with kind terms. Tonight the Russian capcom informed us that as a result of the wedding day of recognition in the US, throughout the day folks had been taking florals as well as lining all the wall surfaces of the United States embassy in Moscow, as well as this night they were actually igniting candlesticks in the street outside the consular office. Just how the globe has actually changed.Folks all over appear to acknowledge the senselessness and scary in this particular attack. And the remarkable loss. Moscow has dealt with these sort of problems in the last couple of years along with apartment or condo and subway bombings, so they are as troubled to get rid of this threat as our experts are actually. Yet the bottom product line is that there are great individuals almost everywhere who want to live in calmness. I read that a child inquired, "The United States is therefore great to various other countries, our experts constantly aid every person, how can they detest our team a great deal?".I really hope the example of participation as well as rely on that this spacecraft plus all individuals in the system show daily are going to someday inspire the rest of the world to work the same way. They must!However, our company won't be taking flight over the US while folks are igniting candle lights. Do not know if our company might find that anyhow. Our experts carried out, however, view an incredibly uncommon as well as wonderful sight a couple of mins ago: the launch of our Docking Compartment on a Soyuz booster. Our company were actually surpassing it and it came into view regarding 3 mins after its own launch from Baikonur as the sun hit our station, so it was still in the dark. It resembled a large comet with a right, vast tail silhouetted versus the dark earth underneath. Regardless of some bad lights for some time as the sunshine attacked our home window at a low perspective, I took care of some video of it as to begin with our experts passed the rocket, and after that saw it start to catch up as it gained height and also speed. I filmed until main motor cutoff and booster splitting up developed equally as our team came close to dawn on the Mountain ranges. A remarkable sight in an extraordinary week ...Life takes place, even in space. Our experts're here to keep ... Frank.